This time, i will be back with the summary of the book - Never Eat Alone - by Keith Ferrazi. After How to Win Friends And Influence People, this is the most recommended book about building relationships. So he we go..
Being a part of the club:
There is a separate mindset for people who are able to have better relationships. You should genuinely care about the other person. So the first part of the book is about the mindset.
Reciprocity is the gussied-up word people use later in life to describe this ageless principle. I just knew the word as "care."
By being connected, you can ask for help, you can give help and help each other all the time.
Until you become as willing to ask for help as you are to give it, however, you are only working half the equation.
Dont keep score:
Don't expect these to be transactions. Just because you did something doesn't mean you should expect something from them. You will get help when needed.
Whats your mission:
Understand what you are trying to achieve. Then try to see who in your network can help you reach there soon.
Build before you need:
You cannot build something just when you need it. You have to build it before you need it.
The fact is everyone will feel embarrassed to ask. But you have to do it anyway to get what you want. And more often than not people are happy to help. Find a model whom you can learn from, learn speaking from toastmasters, get involved, get therapy ( talk about your negative emotions) and just do it.
Don't be a networking jerk:
Don't schmooze or gossip, because one day or the other everyone will find out you are not trustworthy and will not tell anything important to you and then you will not have anything to gossip.
Be transparent, which helps people to contribute.
Treat people under you well. Have an opinion and say it. Share with the world what you have.
Don't be overly efficient. The author tells a story of how he used to hire helpers to sign and send new year greetings, and finally his friend telling him that he got three cards all signed by a different person.
So the aim is to make friends not just send letters or greetings.
If you're not making friends while connecting, best to resign yourself to dealing with people who don't care much about what happens to you.